Not Impaired, But Empowered: Deaf Ministy in Japan

By Natalie Beck

"You need to put your daughter in a deaf school where she can learn sign language. At this level of deafness, she may never be able to talk." These were the words Mom heard from the audiologist after extensive hearing tests. I was 31/2 years old when Mom realized that I had a hearing problem. But the idea of putting me in a school for the deaf, learning only sign language, did not appeal to her.

Mom wanted me to talk like hearing people, so she located a school about an hour away. There I learned to use a hearing aid. It wasn't a small, behind-the-ear kind; it seemed to me, a HUGE headphone and box, strapped to my body. I couldn't play while wearing it. Later, I received a small hearing aid, which is what I use today. Learning new sounds and words and how to put syllables together was tough. I remember trying to say the word, "hippopotamus." When I got it out, the teacher was so thrilled she gave me an M & M.™

I graduated to kindergarten at Beamer Elementary School in Woodland, California. I liked to tease and play tricks, like the other kids. But unlike them, I had speech therapy once or twice a week until high school. The real teaching was at home. Mom was a strict teacher, making sure I got my "s", "c" and "z" sounds right. She taught me to listen to different sounds and made sure I was speaking clearly. Mom refused to use sign language because once she saw I could speak and hear with the help of the hearing aid, she didn't want me to depend on sign language.

At school I was labeled "dumb" or "stupid" because I didn't hear the teacher's question. When I felt sorry for myself, I would cry to Mom. Her answer was always, "Natalie, you don't have a handicap. The only handicap you have is what you think you cannot do."

I was not always a model student because of my adventuresome spirit, but when I did study I usually did well. I didn't have many friends; who wanted to befriend a dumb, hard-of-hearing girl? I enjoyed basketball, volleyball, and cross-country, but they didn't fill the emptiness inside. Why don't I feel happy? What am I supposed to do with my life? Where do I go from here? These were questions I asked myself during my junior year in high school. A friend invited me to Calvary Baptist Church. Although I thought church was for weak people, she was persistent, and finally I went. I was quickly drawn to the youth group and their pastor, Ken Williams. No one made fun of my hearing problem. After attending the group for about a month, I started to catch the message about Jesus dying for my sins. Sins? I hadn't done anything horrendous! Sure, I lied a few times, but that's nothing worth dying for. During the high school retreat, I learned that Jesus' death was not based on the grossness of my sin, but on the greatness of God's love. I accepted Christ as my Savior in January 1985.

Salvation didn't answer all my questions, but I realized that God had a plan for me. After high school, my family moved to Sacramento where I attended American River College.

There I met Kevin, a deaf student who asked me to sign for him at evangelistic meetings. I took a sign language class, and because I was with Kevin and his friends a lot, I learned quickly. Then I began to have a different struggle. Some deaf people wouldn't accept me as hard-of-hearing. They felt that only 100% hearing impaired should be considered deaf. I was also afraid that if I used sign language, God might make me lose the rest of my hearing. I decided I not to sign anymore. I remember the exact spot where I told God I was quitting the deaf ministry. The moment I said it, I knew I had grieved Him. Within 48 hours, I had an ear infection in my good ear. As soon as the pain came, I realized the Lord was trying to get my attention. I refused to take pain killers because I had to study for a final exam. Big mistake. The pain was so bad I couldn't study or sleep. The ear became swollen, and I couldn't put in my hearing aid. I wrestled with the deaf ministry issue for six hours. Finally, I surrendered, "Lord, if you want me to use sign language again, I will."

I felt as if the Lord reached down to hug me. I was awake the rest of the night praising God. The next day I was tired and my ear throbbed. I walked into the classroom, received my test, sat down at my desk and prayed, "Lord, this is a pass or fail test. I know that you have the power to take away this pain, but all I'm asking is for strength to finish this test and pass it. Amen." The moment I picked up the pencil ALL the pain in my head, stomach, and ear was gone. I passed the test, too.

I transferred to Western Baptist College in Salem, Oregon to begin my Elementary Education degree. There I met a deaf pastor and his hearing wife, Rick and Deb McClain. I shared with them my struggles of not feeling accepted in either the hearing or the deaf world. They told me I need to be like the Apostle Paul: be deaf in the deaf world, and hearing in the hearing world. They also said that I needed to ACCEPT my hearing loss, and not be ashamed or embarrassed that I can't hear well. Rick and Deb reminded me that I cannot use my weakness as an excuse for NOT doing God's will. With that wise counsel I began teaching Sunday school to deaf children and attending a deaf church.

While a student at Western, I came into contact with many missionaries and mission agencies. I promised God I would continue in deaf ministries overseas, and kept being interested in the country of Japan. When Bill Commons, then ABWE's Enlistment Director, came to the college, I talked with him, explaining that I wanted to go to Japan, be a school teacher, and work in the deaf ministry. At that time a deaf missionary couple living in Japan needed an elementary school teacher for their hearing boys. God knew their needs long before they went to Japan, and He prepared me for that work.

Since my arrival in Japan in March 1997, God has given me numerous opportunities to witness to the deaf. Twice God has put me in the same train car with a deaf couple. He has given me speaking opportunities with the non-Christian deaf throughout Nagano state.

I often tell the deaf that we are blessed with a body and a mind that works, we can communicate, so let us be used of God. I look forward to serving Him in Kagoshima with Bill and Becky Petite, in a church of both hearing and deaf people. I am eager to see how the Lord will work in our team.

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